Just take a Breath
Hello my dear loves!
We are a week away from what is sure to be an absolutely incredible and fulfilling Master Class (get your ticket here!) and I wanted to take this moment to reflect on what Compassion can really do to create a mindset of loving kindness and abundance.
This past Thursday I hopped on a plane from Philadelphia to Austin, TX with a plan to visit my best friend and connect with some conscious spaces in the area. My partner is a first year med student and so this trip was meticulously planned so that we would have a friend over for the weekend to help around the house and support them and our fur babies while I was gone.
What followed was a series of miscommunication and mishaps that resulted in my having to cut my trip a day short, change flights suddenly and eat the fees and honey when I tell you I felt frustrated I was about ready to pop. Being married to a med student is not easy by any means, honey, and I honestly felt and witnessed all of my neurotic thoughts come up when I realized I had to cut my trip short.
I felt angry, and all I wanted to do was place blame.
I wanted to blame our friend, my partner, a healthcare education system that was built on the backs of traumatized doctors, traumatizing future doctors, I blamed myself for taking a trip when I knew my partner had finals coming up.
Blame, blame, blame, blame, blame.
And when these feelings come up, I felt the poison of aversion come up.
Feelings of fight, flight, and fawn all bubbled up inside my body and I came up with collectively absurd ideas to no longer feel any of it.
When we are overwhelmed, when we are in a state of trigger, reactivity is very natural.
The brain goes into overdrive and distinguishes the world in black and white, all it needs to do is find a solution to the problem, no matter if the solution is actually beneficial in the long term.
And in that moment, when I felt like I was suffocating, I went back to my Spiritual Toolkit and I took a slow, deep breath.
With each breath I held space for my feelings. I held space for my thoughts.
Breathing in, I feel angry.
Breathing out, I hold space for my anger.
Breathing in, I feel overwhelmed
Breathing out, I calm myself
Breathing in, I feel my body
Breathing out, I calm my body.
I did this over, and over again, allowing the emotions to arise and holding space without comment, without judgment, and without getting hooked by the accompanying thoughts.
And, in time, I was able to let go.
This opened me up to the suffering my partner was experiencing in that moment. Their feelings of overwhelm, the difficulty they faced in balancing what our home and fur babies needed with their commitment to med school, and I knew that I wanted to alleviate that suffering.
So, I bought a ticket for the following morning, and I made my journey back home.
Fully present in the knowledge that I made my decision to return home from a state of equanimity.
My decision was rooted in the decision to alleviate my partner’s suffering.
And there isn’t a single part of me who feels any type of “resentment” or “blame.”
Instead my commitment to compassion filled me up. I woke up feeling light, present, and wanting to serve those around me.
Our Compassion can be a delicious nectar that fills us up and energizes us, but only if you are truly rooting your behavior in a state of equanimity and an urge to be of service to others.
I would like to invite you to really take a breath. In those moments when you feel as though you have no options and I kindly remind you dear one that you always have options.
If you are a caregiver, if you have children, or a career, you always have a choice. You can choose to stay in an environment or stay to walk away. But when we say we do it because we have to we invite resentment to build a home within us.
So in those moments of overwhelm take a breath, then take another, hold space and open yourself up to abundance, and taste the healing nectar of Compassion.
My loves if you feel a calling and urge to reclaim your compassion then I would invite you to sign up for my Master Class coming up on Saturday, February 26th from 2 PM NY time - 4 PM NY time. We not only will be coming together for this lesson but the proceeds from every ticket purchased will be donated in support of the victims of Super Typhoon Rai in the Philippines.
You’ll definitely want to attend this live but if you are not able to everyone who buys a ticket will get a link to the playback!
Come and be of service to yourself and others dear ones.
Reclaiming my Compassion: Empowering Our Community Care
With all of my love,
Jemarc